We are mortal....it's hard to believe sometimes, and the truth of it is that we just don't believe it. When we are young, it seems like nothing can stop us. Old people have nothing interesting to say, they are boring and cannot surely relate to us, their life is easy and ours is not.
Truth is, the older I get, the less I understand the Lord's ways. I should be getting that very well now....should be living a victorious life of faith...but I am defeated, doubting, wrestling with my flesh and my mind. I condemn myself daily because of my lack of discipline, yet it simply gets worse with the years. My strength is gone, I'm feeling the pains of the decades of brownies, diet soda and lots of ice cream. Dear Jesus, help me.
I am suffering with chronic issues: MRSA, pancreatitis, arthritis pain, and stomach troubles. Limping, unsure about what I'm supposed to do, feeling helpless and just plain ole tired. Lord, do you have anything left for me to do? I feel like I've spent too much, grinding away at crazy jobs while ill-fitted to do it, with so many pounds on my body. Paying the piper now.
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